By Kelly Caldwell
We all know that networking is essential for business development. That doesn't mean it's easy—particularly for introverts. The good news is that successful networking doesn't require an innately outgoing personality. I have to step out of my comfort zone pretty much every time I head to a networking event. Here are some of my thoughts for introverted lawyers who want to build meaningful professional connections while staying true to their naturally shy tendencies.
Know Your Peak Hours
I think one of the first steps to successful networking is to understand when you're at your best, both cognitively and energetically. Are you an Early Bird who thrives at dawn, or a Night Owl who's most alert in the evening? Rather than fighting your natural rhythm, plan your networking activities around your peak hours.
For instance, if you're most energetic in the morning, focus on breakfast meetings and lunch events. Night Owls might find evening mixers more productive. There's no one-size-fits-all approach—the key is to schedule networking activities during times when you're naturally most alert and engaging.
Pro Tip: Occasionally, you will no doubt need to attend events outside your peak hours. Just plan accordingly. This might mean blocking off recovery time the next day or taking a strategic "disco nap" before evening events, to feel energized.
Prepare Strategically for Events
Before any networking event, take some time to prepare. Honestly, I think research and preparation are any introvert’s best secret weapons.
Consider doing the following before you attend any networking event:
Review the attendee list to identify key contacts
Research the backgrounds of the people you want to meet
Prepare relevant conversation starters and questions in advance
Check to see if the event has its own LinkedIn page and, if so, follow that page to keep abreast of active discussions and to make potential connections
Engage with any event-related social media content to warm up connections before meeting in person
And just remember: The goal isn't to meet everyone in the room; it's to make meaningful connections that can grow into valuable professional relationships. When you do attend, don’t pressure yourself to meet a volume of people. Walking away from an event with even one or two good connections is a win and should be celebrated as such.
Create Your Own Networking Environment
Sometimes, larger events are just too ‘unknown’ for some of us. And that’s okay; there are other ways to network. For some, the best strategy may be to take control of the networking environment entirely. Instead of attending an industry mixer, you might consider:
Organizing an intimate dinner party - ask close contacts to bring someone interesting
Arranging small lunch meet-ups - deepen connections with existing contacts
Hosting focused discussion groups - mix some education or networking with great conversation
Pro Tip: There's a very particular and positive dynamic when you gather with others over food and beverages. Breaking bread together, so to speak, can quite often create a relaxed and more genuine connection than traditional networking events. Remember: a meaningful conversation with three people can be more valuable than briefly meeting twenty somewhat random contacts.
Leverage One-on-One Connections
Many introverts find large and even medium-sized group settings overwhelming. That’s okay, building relationships can absolutely happen on a one-on-one basis. Instead of meeting at a conference, reach out to past contacts, current clients, and warm prospects with things like:
Individual coffee meetings
Personal lunch invitations
Targeted follow-up conversations
Small group discussions
Sometimes, these more intimate get-togethers allow for deeper conversations and stronger connections. Introverts tend to hate small talk and crowds–but we often crave and are good at forging strong, meaningful relationships. These one-on-one approaches can play to that strength.
Harness Digital Platforms
Online networking can be particularly effective for introverts, offering a comfortable way to initiate and maintain professional relationships. For lawyers, we find that LinkedIn is by far the best online platform for networking.
To level-up your LinkedIn game, do the following:
Maintain an active, professional LinkedIn presence
Keep your bio and photo updated
Curate your feed, following people and businesses of importance to you
Share relevant industry insights and articles you com across
Engage thoughtfully with others' posts
Join and participate in professional groups
Send personalized connection requests
Use LinkedIn as a handy way to follow up with new connections you make
Be a World-Class Listener
We introverts may not be the chattiest in the room, but we are often some of the best listeners. You can use this skill to your advantage white you practice active listening skills.
During your interactions:
Ask thoughtful, open-ended questions
Focus on understanding others' perspectives
Take mental notes for future follow-up
Look for opportunities to make meaningful connections between people or ideas
Follow Up Meaningfully
Finally, master the art of follow-up. Honestly, this part is so simple–and anyone can do it. And without following up on your networking activities, you’re not going to see the real value of those efforts.
Some ideas for following up:
Send a personalized thank-you message within 24 hours by LinkedIn or email
Reference specific conversation points to show genuine interest
Suggest concrete next steps or future meeting plans
Share relevant resources discussed during your conversation
Pro Tip: If you want to stand out from the crowd, send a brief, handwritten note to a new contact at their place of work. For years I’ve kept ‘thank you’ cards in my car’s glove box, along with a stack of pre-stamped envelopes. If I have an appointment or meet someone that I want to form a stronger connection with, I write up a brief note right after our meeting, and drop it in the nearest mailbox.
To be effective at networking, you don’t need to be an extrovert. But, if you are an introvert, you’ll need to play to your strengths–and practice. Focusing on quality over quantity, prepare thoroughly, control your environment when possible, and leverage your natural listening skills. Doing all of this, you will remain authentic and reasonably within your comfort zone, while still building a strong professional network. Remember: quiet lawyers can make big connections.
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